Dragon Fizz
Dungeons & Dragons-themed soda will do nothing good to your hit points
There’s nothing that makes you work up a thirst quite like
playing Dungeons & Dragons. The die has 20 sides! Do you know how much
energy it takes to roll that thing?
That’s why the folks at Jones Soda have created a line of
Dungeons & Dragons Spellcasting Sodas. The fantasy fizz is available in flavors
ranging from Dwarven Draught to Potion of Healing to Sneak Attack to something
called Bigby’s Crushing Thirst Destroyer. (We pity your thirst knowing what
unholy pain Bigby is about to inflict upon it.) The only problem is that the names don't exactly explain what a soda called, for example, Sneak Attack might actually
taste like. Our best guess is that it probably tastes like fear.
Carbonated fear.
Admittedly, you probably don’t play Dungeons & Dragons
anymore. But don’t worry. The beverages have been officially sanctioned for
consumption while pursuing modern day D ‘n D equivalents, such as dominating World
of Warcraft or playing Magic: The Gathering or sitting around awkwardly and not
talking to girls.
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